To forgive is to accept what happened and let go of the pain it caused you. Once you remove this pain, you’ll find the urge to seek revenge also vanishes, and your life becomes balanced once more. While there are countless ways to truly forgive someone, below we’ve identified the most powerful actions you can take. Read on so you can bring the true meaning of forgiveness into your life.
How to Forgive Someone Who Wronged You in 7 Steps
1. Take Time to Feel the Pain
The first step in forgiving someone is acknowledging you’re hurt. If you try to immediately put aside your pain, chances are it’ll later blow up in your face. Instead, sit with your pain. Cry if you need to. Be mature enough to accept that pain is a part of life, and you have to grow and learn from it. Once you feel like you don’t want to be with your pain anymore, it’s time to move onto the next step.
2. Identify the Reasons Why You Were Hurt
After feeling your pain, it’s time to single out the reasons you were hurt. Was it because of other people’s insensitivity or pride? By defining what it is that hurt you, you can clear your head and focus on avoiding these events or actions in the future.
3. Express Your Emotions in Healthy Ways
Forgiveness helps you take care of your mind and body. However, you still have to let your anger and pain out — just in the healthiest way possible. What does that look like? As long as you’re not hurting anyone, it’s a healthy way. This means putting away grudges in the interest of your health.
Tip: Engaging in music or art is one of the best ways to express your emotions.
4. Talk to Someone Who Has Had the Same Experience as You
Next is to get advice from someone who has been in your situation. Hearing how someone else handled their anger or the situation as a whole can be helpful.
Tip: Try to talk to someone who’s not your friend. After all, talking to your friends is different from having a conversation with someone who has the same experience as yours.
5. Approach the Person Who Wronged You
After accomplishing all the previous steps, you’re now ready to face the person who wronged or hurt you. However, you’ll need the courage to approach them and the humility to give this person a chance to explain. If it makes you feel any better, the moment you decide to approach this person, you become the bigger person.
6. Listen to What They Have to Say
Forgiveness is.. pic.twitter.com/UG9PFckQQy
— feeling msgs (@FelingMsgs) January 11, 2018
Agreeing to meet with the person who wronged you isn’t enough. You also have to listen to what they have to say. Although your mind will tell you to block them out, your heart will know what’s best to do. Listening to their side of the story is crucial to your pursuit of forgiveness. Not only might your perspective change, but you’ll also be able to feel how sorry they are.
7. Forgive and Move On
Lastly, forgive everyone involved in the conflict — including yourself. Forgive others for the terrible things they’ve done to you. Forgive yourself for living in pain and anger. You may have done things you now regret because of how broken you were, but it’s over now. Let go of the past, so you can rebuild yourself and move on with your life.
You don’t need to rush when it comes to forgiving. For even more insight on how to forgive, here’s a video from The School of Life:
Give yourself and others the best gift one can offer— forgiveness. After all, to forgive is to make the world a better place. Forgiving someone can also help you nurture your spirituality, so you can live in peace.
Do you have any other tips to help forgive someone? Tell us in the comments below!